Disclaimer : The following conversation to be followed at your own risk! All references are based on real life experiences and encounters of the author with a sassy toddler. All resemblances are real and not coincidental.
From here on Mom referred to as “Me” and Toddler Referred to “Nee”
1. Grammar Nazi
Me : Tell me na what happened in class today sweetie. Ma’am do anything?
Nee : Mom na is Hindi word. It’s- did anything happen in class today! You told me to speak correctly yesterday . Uff! ( Pats her small palm on her forehead)
Moral : Do unto others what you would do unto yourself. What goes around comes around!
2. Draamebaaz
Me : We need to finish writing 1 to 70. Homework has to be submitted tomorrow.
Nee : Can you please check my head it’s paining. I cannot write. My hand I think it’s broken (broken used loosely as if body is of glass and can break or mend).
Me : Ok let’s go to doctor. Let’s get you checked!
Nee : No you got medicine for me last time so we don’t need to go. You just press my head and put balm on my hand that is enough.
Moral : Oscar winning performances can be learned from a mere 5 year old. Why send for classes.
3. What goes around comes around
Me : Can we watch my programme on television now?
Nee : Yesterday you did not let daddy watch match so today my turn to watch . You said to do everything turn by turn no.
Moral : As you sow so shall you reap
4. Fashion Police
Me : (We are going out so worn Indian ethnic,casual ones). So how am I looking?
Nee : Can you please wear pink so we can match. You wore this last time already ok. Please change.
Moral : Mini me has better fashion sense. I rest my case
Be kind. You never know who lost an argument to a toddler today!!!
- Pooja Guha-Bansode
- June 15, 2017
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