Letting the kids do things for themselves, makes them feel competent and worthy. It develops a positive self-identity and a sense of pride.
It is essential for a child’s complete emotional, psychological & physical development, to become independent, self-reliant and responsible as they grow. However, it may become challenging for parents to understand when to step back and let their children do things on their own.
Never the less, a balance between allowing your children to do tasks for themselves and assisting them when they seem to need or want is imperative. This balance helps the child to thrive because even though he/she feels confident, he/she is still aware that there will be support and proper mentoring whenever required.
The basic rules to follow would be the following:
Appreciation is imperative
All efforts made by your child must be appreciated. Encouraging him/her to overcome the failures and rewarding the success helps get motivated.
Your child must understand what to expect from you. Rules, rewards and punishments should be consistent. Make sure that you follow through your words; otherwise they don’t have any value.
Do not go back on your words if you have said “no” to something the baby demands. You need not be harsh and rude, be firm with politeness. Your independent baby will often try to remake or stretch the rules, make sure you control him/her with consistent expectations.
Let your child make mistakes
If you are making everything right for your child to follow through then you are not preparing him/her for the world. Making mistakes provides opportunity for him/ her realize that she is not as invincible as she thinks. Let her peer group take control sometimes so that she realizes that she cannot always lead or always be correct.
Interact with your child
You must interact with your child regularly. He/she must be allowed to speak and heard with the same intensity as you would to an adult. It gives them the confidence to think independently and speak up.
Be your child’s coach
When your child asks you questions about how to do something or what to do in a certain situation, sometimes letting them decide is more important than providing answers. “What do you think you should do? How would you feel if you chose X? What would happen if you did Y instead”?These questions can unlock the answers in your child’s brain so the next time he/she in a similar situation he’ll be able to use his own experience and judgment to make the decision.
- January 20, 2016
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