I know I may be hated for saying this and its takes a huge amount of courage to say this on an open forum that many people read, especially moms. So my son started his new school in the first standard. I heard that all the mothers were on a whatsapp group and I wanted to be on it too, I am still on it. The idea of a whatsapp group is to essentially keep us updated with what is happening in the school, homework schedules, important dates etc.
Previously one of our daddy bloggers had picked up exactly this point in his blog about the curious case of whatsapp groups. You can read it here:
I say, if the whatsapp groups are so important then I wonder how our mothers or the mothers before the whatsapp generation of mothers managed all this. We turned out ok. I did. Most of my friends also turned out ok. Our mothers didn’t use whatsapp groups as clutches to survive children’s school life schedule.
What I have realized having been part of the group so far, although it’s just been a month, is that it’s more stressful than helpful. At the risk of being ousted from the group that I am a part of, I would say it has so far induced more stress and a feeling of being incompetent.
So let me explain this further. Being a mother in itself, given today’s time of nuclear families, is a huge task that bears the weight of getting it right already. Add to the mix, a working mother, and it’s a melodramatic mega blockbuster of a thriller, often sending the protagonist on major guilt trips. So when I am working; I am working, I am not thinking about my child. Honestly, I am not, because I am focused at the task on hand. After having been initiated in the Mother’s Whatsapp Group, I see that mothers are constantly worried/chatting/discussing their kids. What does that do to me? Add panic and a feeling of utter incompetence that I am not present enough. Maybe time wise I am not, I would never be able to give as much time. After all I work full time. I as it is get judged enough to send my kid to the day care after school. But trust me, the intentions are noble and as a mother I would want to do as much for the child as any other mother.
I have a feeling that I would be better off just scrolling through the important messages and ignore all the discussions that are not important from the school operations point of view. I am sure it invokes panic in mothers who are barely able to make the two dabbas in the morning, seeing other mothers who share each and every assignment their child has done. Or who share images of assignments and home-works done even before the date of submission.
When did sending children to school become a competition amongst the parents and when did it start giving away the ‘who is a better mom’ award? Is a school whatsapp group a boon or a bane? I for one can survive without this torture of a whatsapp group however having said that, I don’t want to miss out on the important things that I may skip because I am probably not breathing down the school management’s neck to get things done. So I will stand my ground and be on the whatsapp group till the date I have had enough and I can’t survive it anymore.
- Srushti Rao
- June 22, 2017
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